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Bereavement Support & Grief Education
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Bereavement Support
Being deprived of a significant-other through a profound absence,
especially due to the their death, often results in sadness
and a multitude of complicated feelings.
There's help for that here.
The Pain of Loss
Most often, when someone dies, we don't really lose them, at least not in the way in which they might be found, alive. Yet the pain we experience as a result of a significant other's death often does include a deep sense of loss, that is often accompanied by the pain of yearning for their return--even though we know that will never happen. Moving forward without the one who died might seem next to impossible--challenging and painful--as we begin to sort out life and discover who we are without them.
There's help for that here.
Grief
"Our grief is as unique as our fingerprint."
~David Kessler
Grieving the death of a significant other is a multifaceted, emotional process. There is no right, wrong, good, or bad way to grieve. Our spiritual beliefs may, or may not, be helpful. How our grief unfolds is dependent on a myriad of factors, some of them being our relationship with the deceased,
the emotional-climate between us, the other survivors,
and our personal life experiences.
There's help for that here.
(541)351-8909
Witnessing
Grief is not an illness. It is a deeply personal and multilayered experience. Those grieving do not need to be fixed. Their unique bereavement process needs to be witnessed, unconditionally, by someone whose only agenda is to be fully present, supportive, and reflective.
There's help for that here.
Child Loss
There are no words that come close to describing the pain of child loss. Unless we've experienced it, it is unfathomable,
even by the most empathic among us. Though every situation of child loss is unique, a commonality among bereaved parents is that of not only losing our children, but also the future we envisioned for them--and for ourselves. So we grieve for our children, and for the future we imagined. Regardless of how old our children are, when they die, we are changed forever. Feelings of sadness are often accompanied by those of anger, guilt, regret, and despair. Even so, resurfacing, regrouping, and redesigning one's life is absolutely possible--changed and all. Truly.
There's help for that here.
(541)351-8909
Infant Loss
The life of a newborn who died may have ended prior to birth,
or shortly their after. Others may have survived for days,
weeks, or months—with parents, grandparents, and other
loved-ones, sitting by their bedsides vacillating between basking in the glow of their arrival, and fearing the worst, which eventually happened. Still, others may have endured an accidental death. Moving forward, as mothers with bodies so prepared to nurture our babies, without the babies, is a most unnatural state in which we are thrust. And the pride of the fathers who are bereaved, fizzles under the weight of
the loss and grief. Grandparents, too, grieve for the infant and their own child-bereaved. Additionally, for some who have chosen surrogacy or adoption, the loss can be a complex experience among all involved. Regardless of the circumstances, the thoughts and feelings are often intense and intrusive as we deal with life after the loss of our babies.
There's help for that here.
Pregnancy Loss
Regardless of how a pregnancy ends, the emotional consequences are often complex and involve grief. The biological carrier often endures a physical state consistent with pregnancy, weeks (sometimes months) after it has come to an end. Parents, grandparents, and other loved-ones may grieve for the future they envisioned for the baby they lost. Some of us feel anxious, hopeless, and even faulty. Others may experience feelings of unease or regret. Still others may just need to process what happened
whether or not it was by choice.
There's help for that here.
Pet Loss
Our animal companions are family members and, sometimes, the loves of our lives. The death of one of them, be it expected or accidental, often results in a deeply personal sense of loss--one that others may have difficulty understanding. Yet we grieve for the one with whom we spent a great deal of our time caring for, playing with, and cuddling. Sometimes, it is our relationship with our dear animals that made life doable, calmed us when we were anxious, gave us a sense of strength, and kept us active. The gratitude we feel towards them is often immeasurable, and sometimes it was us who, compassionately, made the decision to bring their journey to an end. We may be at peace with our decision or be unsettled and need to process it.
There's help for that here.
Dana Lucas
Dana earned Certification in Grief Education through grief expert, David Kessler's program. She is committed to providing the highest level of grief support through education, experience, and insights into the often unacknowledged rocky terrain of grief. Dana also holds a Masters Degree in Counseling Psychology with a Holistic Health Specialization and Marriage & Family Therapy emphasis, from JFK University, and has studied Co-Active Coaching through her graduate Alma Mater.
Her experience includes online and in person group facilitation, individual Mindset & Personal Growth Coaching, Parenting Consulting, and working in a psychiatric inpatient program, as well as outpatient mental health, behavioral health, and social services.
CERTIFIED GRIEF EDUCATOR
My Grief
I've lived through the experience of more than one unfathomable loss. I'm sure those of you who have happened upon this website, in search of Grief-Support, have at the very least an inkling about the pain I've endured. It is likely that you and/or your loved-ones are in the throes of it. There's help for that here.
Decades ago, I was trained in psychotherapy, social work, coaching, and consulting; and I worked in all the aforementioned fields. Still, nothing prepared me for the process of healing from great, GREAT loss. I was not prepared to understand the complex, emotional process of my own grieving. There was a time when I threw myself into helping others by way of facilitating grief support-groups for a national organization. Convincing myself I was no longer bereaved, I thought defining myself as such meant my life would be one of constant sorrow and despair.
Yet, I am not very skilled at denial, and there came a point at which I decided to forgo facilitating the support groups, and focus solely on my own healing. Rather than resisting my thoughts and emotions, I let them rise. I felt broken for a while, but eventually, using my skills and knowledge, reading the works of those who shared about their own experiences, hiring skilled providers, and trusting a few dear friends and family members, I resurfaced, regrouped, rediscovered who I am, and created a life anew.
My process of healing has been complex, emotionally. Grief is like that. Now, though, I am a more evolved and solid human being. My grief is not gone or complete. It is, simply, integrated into who I am. I am sad on some days, and sometimes I’m angry. There are days when I feel unsteady and vulnerable. I also laugh and experience inner-peace and happiness. Yet, there were days when I didn't know if experiencing joy would ever happen, or if I wanted it to. Fast-forward to today…I'm comfortable being bereaved and welcome the entire spectrum of emotions—all of them.
I've been working collaboratively with individuals and families for 30+ years. Fifteen of those have included supporting, witnessing, and coaching those in grief, and those who love them--individually and in groups. Life after loss is a cumbersome journey. One that is tricky to navigate within a system and culture that fails to have a true understanding of what bereaved people want and need.
One thing I know for sure is that no two people grieve the same. The way we grieve is colored by our life experiences and relationships, as well as our personality types, and other external influences. As a Certified Grief Educator, I've trained under grief expert, David Kessler, and my work with him, and colleagues in this field, is ongoing.
~Dana
Currently, all my sessions are held ONLINE via the ZOOM platform. Please contact me if you want to explore whether I can help you, or someone you care about, with grief. If you need support and someone to witness your story, or want to learn how to support someone who is grieving, I'm here to help.